The Most Common Excuse

“I don’t have time” – Everyone

As much as we might hope or expect it to, life is not going to slow down so you can finally start your project, finish your book, take that trip or get some alone time. We all have the same amount of time in the day and we each have to learn how to get what we need in the time that we have. Or you don’t, which probably makes you feel overwhelmed and angry and eventually exhausted. You might start to feel like you don’t have a say in what you do because your time is owned by everyone else.  

Have you felt like this? Like your schedule is overflowing with everything you have to do and nothing you want to do. It becomes a mix of misplaced priorities and violated boundaries. It feels like you’re constantly overwhelmed with everyone else’s problems and necessities and at the end of the day you’ve done nothing for yourself. It leads to the famous, “I don’t have time.” I don’t have time for this, for that, for myself, for friends, for anything other than going to work, eating and maybe sleeping every once in a while. I just don’t have time.

How have you let yourself get to a place of not “having” time for things you need to be doing for you but find it when you need to please everyone else? It’s easy. You give your time to other people when people are relying on you because we don’t want to let them down. But it’s not easy to stop and realize when you’re being taken advantage of and when you’ve stopped doing the things you need to be doing. It’s worth thinking about how you spend your time. Who you give it to, where you spend it and the way you think about the time you have. We’ve said it our entire lives, “I don’t have time.” We use it as an excuse to other people when we don’t want to do something, but we also tell it to ourselves as an excuse for using it the wrong way. We neglect our priorities and allow others to demand our time like they make the decisions in our life. When you really start to look at how you spend your time, you’ll probably realize that you have much more free time than you thought. You get so focused on the things you say you don’t have time for that you forget what you could be doing with it. We all have the same amount of time and the same ability to make the most of it. It’s a matter of how we see it and use it, it’s the problem and the solution.

When you think of time as a choice, the mindset of priority is pretty powerful. I know I’ve talked about priorities a million times on here before but here we go again. Set and check on your priorities. When you know what they are it’s easier to say no to everything else. When you know what you want, it’s easier not to accept what others demand from you. If an opportunity comes to you that doesn’t line up with what you want then you’ll know when you should probably not take it. Our priorities are not set and stone, your top priorities at one time might be different at another. Pay attention to what’s most important right now. Be aware of what you want out of each period of your life, no matter how long or short it is, and set your priorities accordingly, or don’t be surprised if it doesn’t turn out how you hope.

Do you ever feel like you’re wasting your time doing something, even though it might normally be something you’d be interested in? Do you instead think about the things that you’d rather be doing, or really needed to be doing? Those are moments you need to pay attention to. If you’re finding yourself dreading the experience or wishing that you were doing something else or staying in after the week you’ve had, pay attention to that. Those feelings aren’t happening for no reason. Call it self-discipline or whatever you want, I see it happen when I’m not scheduling time for what is important to me, and then not taking advantage of that time when I do have it. 

We need to stop blaming the amount of time we have when its really just not a priority. Stop doing things that aren’t important to you or for you and spending time with people that don’t matter to you. Everything we do is a decision, you dont need to justify it or make excuses for it. Then keep in mind the same goes for everyone else, dont make excuses for or justify their decisions either. 

Thanks for reading ☀️☀️☀️

24 thoughts on “The Most Common Excuse

  1. Excuse the pun, but the timing of your post could not have been better for me. I had a particularly difficult day yesterday getting frustrated about balancing demands from others on my time, with my studies, for which a deadline is looming. I have taken courage from your words and now know that only I can fix the problem. Thank you for helping me put things into perspective.

    Liked by 5 people

  2. Great post! Setting up the priority is the most important thing for good organisation and actually the most important thing to be truly happy and not regret about anything. As as student,I would myself in a very bad place thanks to bad organisation and badly choosing my priorities. That’s the moment I said to myself ‘STOP!’. I wrote a list of priorities and everything seemed to be easier. Thanks for sharing this!
    Also, I would be thankful if you checked my 1st blog post and write your opinion about it.
    https://simplerchoice.wordpress.com/2019/02/16/becoming-a-minimalist/

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Well I think sometimes we say ‘I don’t have time’ not becuase we genuinley don’t have time, but rather because we don’t want to / to scared / trying to avoid doing a specific task. Personally, I haven’t just told this to my friends and family, but I have also convinced myself on some occasions that I haven’t had time; in order to make myself feel better. Like for instance, I was thinking to myself ‘why don’t i blog more’ and then I told myself the usual stuff : ‘Oh I’m busy with uni, work, friends etc …’ . But in reality I still had plenty of time to blog , I had just prioritised things I didnt find neccesary over it. IE: Watching football, netflixt etc…

    As always very good post.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. I was really struggling with this when I decided I wanted to start writing again after nearly ten years of barely writing a word. Eliminating things like TV and social media were HUGE for me, and thank god I also discovered time blocking. I was also sacrificing my writing for doing things that others wanted me to do, and setting up boundaries on that helped a lot too.

    Liked by 4 people

  5. Great post with valid, well explained, and useful points, dear. Excuses, excuses. While “life” can and does happen, choice or lack thereof is usually the culprit as you stated. What many may not be aware of is the excuses, becoming/feeling overwhelmed, etc. can and often do lead to depression, anxiety, and/or other mental health issues. A pleasure as always, Ms. D. Yellow…

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Oh yes! I make time for who and what’s important; sometimes that means taking care of my own needs before I tackle something else. Sometimes that means saying “no”. And sometimes it means sitting down and really looking at priorities, whether it’s brushing the foster cat (she really needs the love) or setting a timer to limit “toxic time” with people.

    Liked by 4 people

  7. “If you’re finding yourself dreading the experience or wishing that you were doing something else or staying in after the week you’ve had, pay attention to that”. – this is true and a light bulb moment to set priorities what is important to us. Sometimes we forget to appreciate the people around us, which are more important that anything else in this world. Great work!

    Liked by 5 people

  8. I often think about everything I have to do––indeed, everything I want to do as well––and think, “There is no time.” It can get overwhelming. I found a new organizer and each day as well as each week is a spot to put a focus. Today, I will focus on writing my blog post. Or, today I will focus on critiquing short stories for my writer’s group. Or, today I will focus on taking the kids outside to do something fun in nature. I decide to focus on that one thing. Whatever else does or doesn’t get done, I let go.

    Liked by 4 people

  9. I’ve read somewhere that the next time you’re about to say ‘I don’t have time’ exchange it for ‘It’s not a priority’ and see how that makes you react. Maybe it’s really not a priority and then you shouldn’t spend time on it. Or maybe it makes you crinch that you’re not prioritizing it and if so you ought to give it time.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Pingback: The time is now . . . – ChristineWilkinsonCoaching

  11. I’ve found that a lot of people (formerly myself included) operate on a fallacy of “having enough time” = “having a huge, empty chunk of time every day for personal projects.” If you are awesome at time management, even that can be a possibility, but “having enough time” can so often just be about fitting in the things you want to do it fits and spurts around other obligations. I’ve been doing clay work and painting around the myriad other things I have to do, and it’s taking forever to finish a project, but I’m still seeing progress and reaping the benefits of doing something I enjoy doing, even if it’s just for ten minutes here or fifteen minutes there – time that would otherwise be spent, let’s be honest, on my phone. As side benefits, it keeps up the creative momentum, so that I’m not stuck of stagnant when I do get some time to devote to it, and I still get the psychological satisfaction (and excitement) of having a creative project underway.

    Liked by 3 people

  12. This is a great post. We always have enough time, it is just important as to how we use it. This is something I am working on learning all the time. It is a tough one to handle. I need to give up things that really don’t matter and suck up my time in a negative way. I need to keep my eyes on what God wants me to do, not what I think must be done. Thank you for sharing this.

    Liked by 4 people

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